Does motherhood feel lonely? Have you found your people?
If you have, you are blessed! Cherish them! There are so many reasons to connect with people. Friends offer support, advice, prayer, laughter, accountability, and so much more.
Maybe you are struggling to meet amazing new mom friends. Personally, my group of friends has changed (slightly) with every major life transition I’ve gone through. If this sounds like you–here are some ideas to help you make new friends and hopefully, find your people.
1) JOIN A GROUP.
Finding friends with common interests is a great way to connect. Do you have any hobbies? There are plenty of interest-based groups to choose from on Meetup, Facebook, and even your local parks and recreation organization.
Like to dance? Take a class. Are you a mom with little babies? Join a stroller walking group to make friends and get in shape. Or join a MOPS group. Many churches host small groups and other ministries where you can connect with others and meet potential friends.
2) BE PROACTIVE.
Sometimes we have to put ourselves out there and create the community that we are longing for. Take the first step. Say hello. Offer a [genuine] compliment. Invite someone for coffee or a playdate. You have nothing to lose, and you get bonus points for bravery.
3) KEEP AN OPEN MIND.
I’m going to keep it real here, I don’t have to scroll very far to see that judgment and competition are each kind of a serious issue among women.
These two things are barriers to connection, and we can absolutely bridge these gaps by remembering that 1) we are all doing the best we know how to and 2) love covers a multitude of wrongs. If we stopped to think about it, we probably have a lot more similarities than differences.
4) OPPOSITES ATTRACT.
This point sort of goes with #3. At the risk of sounding cliché, you cannot judge a book by its cover. That woman you know with resting you-know-what face may actually turn out to be a great friend. The quiet lady who sits in the corner of your [whatever] class may just have social anxiety, and may (once you get to know her) actually be an amazing person to hang with. Away from tons of people, maybe.
5) KEEP YOUR EXPECTATIONS IN CHECK.
Ideally, you’ll want to keep your inner circle tight. Choosing your friends wisely means choosing people who are a positive influence, who treat you with respect, and are at the very least, not shady. At the end of the day, people are just people who sometimes make mistakes. And people are imperfect and cannot be your everything. Don’t put the key to your happiness is someone else’s pocket.
Hopefully, these tips helps someone out there make at least a new friend or two!